What is a ‘Man Box’ and how can we be free from its constraints?

Carmen Bryce

Communications Manager, Mental Health Ireland

The phrase ‘Man Box’ has emerged in psychology in recent years to describe the constraints that exist around men and the conformity to masculine beliefs, which have a significant impact on men’s health and mental health.

From childhood, men are often ‘boxed in’ by what they can and cannot feel, say and do. Anything that doesn’t fit or falls outside this box — playing with dolls, expressing fear or sadness — can pay a heavy social price. Boys learn quickly that they need to prove they fit in the box and as they grow into men, the box begins to feel smaller and smaller — more and more suffocating.

Constraints of the ‘Man Box’

Speaking at Mental Health Ireland’s ‘Man I Am’ webinar, Dr Shane O’Donnell, Health Promotion and Improvement Officer with the HSE says: “We know from research that men who feel that they have to live up to these expectations often have negative mental health outcomes. They feel they have to be the breadwinner; self-reliant; emotionally withdrawn; the provider for the family; be physically strong; to drink alcohol.

“It really is a very limited frame we feel we have to fit into. Men who don’t fit into this frame can feel as if they’re failing as a man. It also leaves us with a limited set of tools to respond to the stresses in life.”

Men often go undiagnosed for mental health issues and are more reluctant to seek help than women.

Men don’t seek help

The box is surrounded by a code of silence — real men don’t talk about their problems; real men don’t ask for help. This prevents men from seeking professional help and care when going through emotional or personal crises. This can lead to a propensity for poor mental health, substance use, and suicidal tendency.

In Ireland, men are four times more likely to die by suicide than women. However, there are higher rates of depression and anxiety among women. This indicates that men often go undiagnosed for mental health issues and are more reluctant to seek help than women when they’re struggling.

Getting out of the ‘Man Box’

Poor mental health and high suicide rates among men are a modern-day epidemic, and we’re taking action. Ireland was the first country to have a men’s health policy — largely driven by the Men’s Health Forum in partnership with the HSE to support men’s health and mental health. We must work hard to break the cycle of silence and shame among men and provide a safe and supportive space outside of the confines of the ‘Man Box.’